Contributed by D Krishna Prasad
Parenting is not a job, it’s a responsibility you take upon your family. Don’t feel it as a burden while you are a parent. I see many parents’ gets frustrated with their family wife-husband relationships and end up venting that anger on kids. This is not at all a right parenting. I say “Nooooooooo”. A good parent strives his or her best to take better decisions about their kids in terms of their interests and other personal requirements and needs. “Honestly no child is perfect and no parent is parent” but the matter of fact is everyone have certain standards of living and expectations of how to live a life. Based upon that, you can make your child grow better in that environment. “Sometimes expectations fail and sometimes the child fails” is because you forgot to keep a regular eagle’s eye on your child. Setting high standards isn’t actually wrong by any parent. But have you ever visited your child’s brain and ever you questioned it to yourself, can my child do this? Or he or she has ideas in any other fields of pursuing? Noooooo, unfortunately many parents failed as a parent due to this very reason. We make choices based on the options you have, but not the options which child have. Not every child is the same and not every child has got the same brain or memory to take things that easily. So here are the 10 important things that parents should know as a parent in order to be a better parent.
1.Spend quality time with your kids:
“Your kids are yours, not someone’s”. I understand that handling regular house work and office work concomitantly is very difficult. I get it. But every parent should understand that giving birth isn’t the only job. At a young stage kids need parents. These days we see kids or children are not so close to parents, they don’t share anything with their parents and be silent in their rooms. This is the reason behind this activity. From the inception stage, the child should be taken care under the guidance of their own parents. This makes the children to be joyous and congenial enough to share anything with parents.
2.Never fight in front of your children:
The most notable thing these days parents should understand is to never fight in front of children. Because this will create a negative impact about relationships, love and having a family in the future. Brain takes bad so quickly, so when you fight in front of them, it describes a wrong feeling in the young minds.
3.Listen to your child:
What does listening have anything to do with parenting? This is the question you might ask me. A proper relationship with you and your kid takes place when you have a proper conversation with each other. Giving what the child wants is a complete different frame story. First let them say or converse what they want to express. Understand them what they really trying to say. The child/kid feels so happy to some extent feeling “My parents are so good, they listen to me”, so when they get a positive feeling on you as a parent, then you are half way successful as a parent. So here the chicanery tricky aspect, your kid listens to you after that, because you gave time to your kid or child to express everything freely.
4.Encourage your children:
Everyone wants their own child to be successful. It makes parents proud and the child himself/herself. When your child wants to pursue something other than his or her regular activity, let them pursue with their own interests, who knows they might find themselves fit and right in that new shoes which they are pursuing. Maybe there career might get a kick start after pursuing that new interest. It can be either music, dance, sports or any interest, let your kid pursue their interest.
5.Give them right education:
Ask your kid to study isn’t sufficient, making the study in their interested field and choice will make them happy to study further. Otherwise, these days students or kids or youngsters lacking interest after their pursuing of degrees, because many used to say that they have pursued with family pressure and some say that my uncle’s son did or something like that. Help your kids understand and help them in figuring out what are they good at. There is no end to avenues in education. It is just we just are open to a few and choose only those which the previous generations are doing for years. So, parents should help their own kids or children to help them in figuring out the right box/field of study. “Right education gives right knowledge about that domain and eventually right domain knowledge leads to getting up a right job”, not just a job but a happy job to work at the workplace.
6.Don’t scold your kids, explain them in a better way:
Scolding or hurting your kids will make them even harsh and they start behaving with you in the same fashion which later hurts you back for sure which I don’t want to see. Parents are first teachers and home is the first place where every kid begins their learning and growing. So hard behaviour and fights at home would distract in a bad way to the minds of a kid or children. Make them sit with you with their favourite food in their hands or game in their hands just to keep them pampered for a while and then explain in a solicitous, amicable and devoted way. They’ll for sure understand you and you’ll feel blessed to have such a child.
7.Counsel your child:
Psychology believes that half of the muddle mix-up complications get resolved by talking. So what is counselling? It is very understandable that these days’ children are so bamboozled by the content and theory going in the markets in terms of education choosing, jobs and many more issues. I agree when children turn into 18+, they gets matured need to take their own decisions but it’s evident that after getting into a job where you know the whole work, you still undergo 1-3 months stipulated training. How old the kid grows, they still need your back and counselling them on weekly basis makes themselves clear of things in their way.
8.Make them understand that hard work is key to success:
There are smart ways to do things but hard work is the base for anything to achieve. Either it can be name, fame, status, money. Understand them to work hard and achieve in a smart way. And be their strength instead of weakening them saying that “You can’t do this”. This is the most discouraging line and a defaming statement for a child to hear. This diminishes their self-confidence. Tell them this one line “Work hard in a smart way”which keeps them boosted.
9.Keep an eye on your child:
As a parent, you should simultaneously have an eye on your child and see what he or she is doing with their life. Whether they are going in a good way or not. Because these generations young kids at a very early age around aging 15-20 getting into drugs, trafficking, alcohol consumption, smoking and many such illegal things. See behind their nose and keep a track of everything. Sometimes being strict with rules isn’t wrong as a parent, and you have that right upon your child. This makes the child understand that he or she should be careful before they get into anything.
10.Make them understand about financing and money aspects:
Parents earn money and invest upon child’s education and family needs. But the main thing parents should make kids understand is how important money is. As once said in the book “Rich dad poor dad” it goes like “The love of money is the root of all evil” “The lack of money is the root of all evil”. Make your kids understand the value of money before they spend a rupee. Make them learn the basic uses of saving money for future and its uses during future unpredictable crisis or chaos. Wish everything goes smooth, but maybe thinking in the other way for our safety isn’t wrong for a second I guess. So teach your kids how to make money, save money and do business with it.
I hopefully hope, these ten commendable tips you would follow as a parent and be one of those better parents where your kid brags himself/herself stating that “Here are my coolest mom and dad” when you visit any fancy store or a party or on a weekend tour. Always remember, if you failed as a parent, you almost failed as a person too.