This might not be one of those letters that end with a forced optimism of things magically turning themselves to the better. No, this is undoubtedly not going to falsely make a facade of motivating you and this most certainly is not going to be a pessimistic, no hope sort of letter. What this is certainly going to be is a reality check. Although, an article from an anonymous someone, giving you a reality check is probably already a sign for you to realise how much of validation you seek. I used to be this person once; I know what goes on in one’s cranium when it is impossible to consider they are good enough. I know how bizarre it might sound when an assistant of a store tells the dress looks gorgeous on you. It might certainly seem like a marketing ploy and maybe it is, but the actuality that you are giving someone else the opportunity to define you, is not okay. The fact that you take into consideration every person’s judgement, allowing it to manipulate the way you perceive yourself is compromising with your self-respect. You cannot permit someone else to have power over your feelings or make judgement in any form whatsoever against you. Every time you let that random douches insult get to you, you essentially lost a tad bit of self-respect. You’ve perhaps heard this time and again, but you cannot expect others to love you when you do not love yourself. Right now, it might be grueling to even look at yourself in the way that you should, it might be awful to even mull over the fact that you are undervaluing yourself, but hear me out first.
“You are beautiful”.
If you felt fine reading the previous sentence, I’ve got some good news for you, you might not be self-sabotaging after all, but if you cringed while reading it, I’ve got some real news for you; you might, after all, be self-sabotaging. The fact that someone even perceives you to be beautiful doesn’t appeal to you because you either think they are lying or you set these unrealistic standards for yourself in order to constantly impress them and that, is an extremely tiring task. An ideology that somebody views you better than you view yourself is unacceptable, why? Why is it okay for you to sabotage and critic yourself over and over again, but it is not okay for somebody to genuinely believe you are beautiful? How many new approvals is it going to take for you get away from your “safe zone” and apply for your dream job or dream college? How many more criticisms is it going to take for you to realise that criticisms, are just another way to build yourself up instead of breaking you down? How many more reassuring articles like this are going to take you to figure out how remarkable you truly are?
Listen to me you beautiful human (cringed yet?), you do not require approvals of potentially perplexed fellow humans, you do not need a standard to live up to, you do not need a rule book to live by and you certainly do not need someone preaching you on how to live your life. As rhetoric as this article might sound I promise you it makes sense. You must understand that nobody is going to help you grow other than yourself; nobody knows you like you do and nobody can love you like you could. I was once exceedingly self-sabotaging and I remained torpid for quite some time until I managed to thump sense into my head.
Everything shall pass, unfortunately for us, so shall the opportunities and good memories. You do not want to wake up one day when you are ninety years old wishing you took a trip to the mountains that you’ve always wanted or wishing you asked that cute boy out who you saw at the parking lot. No, you don’t, because one day is a day you can amend, one day, is a day you are in control of.
Wake up sleepy head; wake up before you are ninety!