5 Things Indians Do That Scare The Shit Out Of Foreigners!!

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By Aliza Virani

Having Visitors from another Country? One old cousin who left India years ago is returning? Or are You a part of a Couch Sharing Community and having an International Visitor?

If any of this is a YES my Friend.., be prepared to hear the following Exclamatory statements from your International Visitors:

a. Don’t Drive Like That *Yell* *Yell* *LoudYell*

YELL
No they cannot trust us on the wheel. They cannot trust our roads, our cars, our rickshaw drivers, our bus drivers or anything associated with metal moving on wheels. Well, not that we trust any other driver apart from ourselves but they are Feared Close To A Stroke!

b. I think I’ll have 2 Advils *Cough* *Sneeze*

SNEEZE
I haven’t known any Foreigner who would travel to India without his/her box of basic paracetemol. They are scared of using our medicine and have zero belief in our “Nuskhas” or our Crocins and Benedrylls #Hurts. Please exclude those who have come here for Medicinal Visits.

c. Roads and Animal *Whaaaaaaaaa*

ANIMAL
Zero trust in our transport system and added the fact that our cattle share our road with us are reasons enough for them to develop a seizure. Trust me no amount of explaining and demonstrations help reduce their FEAR of both the cattle and the driver.

d. Food and Refrigerator *I ain’t Eating that No More!*

FRIDGE
So Foreigners especially Muricans don’t cook each day everyday. Most of them (because that are all working) make a meal for a few days store it in various containers and heat portions of food as and when needed. But us?!? We save some for “Kal Dophair mein kha lenge” “Kaamwaali ko dedenge” and what not!!

e. Our Water *Bisleri* *Packaged* *Pure*

WATERWhile they would die to have to Paani Puri across the road or have all the spicy tangy oily dishes we cook at home but they won’t touch water. No Water Germ.. No No Water Germ.. Come Food Germ.. Come Food Germ..

 

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